589 3 часа назад

Текст песни Sudden Death - Fat Chicks in Spandex

Sudden Death - Fat Chicks in Spandex слова песни

Oh no, there they go another herd of elephantsWith big fat legs in tight black pantsAnd an image of themselves that can`t be clear`Cause it`s obvious they ain`t never looked in a mirrorFollowing fashion is no surpriseBut when the fashion follows the form of your thighsAnd reveals every mound and cluster of fatThen it`s time to take `em off and take the damn things backBut no, they gotta go strut their stuffAnd I`m here to say that enough is enoughSpandex shorts, stretch pants and suchIf you weigh too much you`re showin` way too muchSpandex doesn`t hide where you sagYou look like a goddam hefty badWrappin` up all your cellulite wreckageSomethin` tells me it`s gonna be one of those decadesMarchin` in the mall two ton by twoI guarantee that they`re gonna sit by youShowin` off everything the fabric ain`t fixin`Please God please no more fat chicks in spandexEverywhere I go I just can`t get awayFrom the overweight legs gift wrapped every dayI`m a humble man, I don`t ask for muchBut it would be nice to keep down my lunchBut I can`t, they always walk by when I`m eatingMy muscles all lock and my heart starts beatingIrregularly every time that I seeA walking wooly mammoth in a woman`s size threeClumps of fat popping out everywhereHer pants are so tight I can see all her hairIt wiggles and wobbles when they`re ridin` on a bikeNow I know what Al Bundy must feel likeThe only thing I can imagine that would be any worseIs Roger Ebert in a speedo but that`s a whole nother verseThey wear `em so much they`re gonna wear the things upAnd when the pants give away they`re gonna all hang outBeauty`s in the eye of the beholder butWhen these beauties walk by I keep my eyes shutBlack abominations they`re squeezin` their hips inPlease God please no more fat chicks in spandexIf the back of your legs look like cottage cheeseIf you`re talking scale says "get off please"If both of your breasts hang down to your kneesThen you shouldn`t be wearin` any spandexIf you look like you`re related to the Toxic AvengerIf a whale gets beached and you try to befriend herIf a mechanic sees your body and attaches a fenderThen you won`t look good in those spandexI`m gonna find who designed them it`s all his faultI`m afraid I`m gonna turn into a pillar of saltWhen I accidentally look at a derriereThat looks like a walking bean bag chairThis has to be a dream but I can`t wake upIt`s too horrible a story to ever make upIt`s the curse of the 20th century manTo be subjected to this torture again and againBy comparison the Spanish Inquisition was tameUndersize pants on an oversize dameJust ain`t the way I like to get my kicksOh please God please no more fat chicks in spandex

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